When my girlfriend drinks she just can’t stop from over doing it. We met in university and drinking was a big part of our lives, but over the past few months I’ve drunk less.
Whenever we go out for drinks she always gets wasted and then spends the next day nursing a hangover. I’ve asked her to slow down but she says I knew what she was like when I started dating her, so I should just deal with it or leave.
What should I do?
I think you have to be patient with your girlfriend. It sounds like you got into this habit together – just because you have now decided that drinking is no longer something you want to do as regularly, does not mean she feels the same.
I can understand why it’s frustrating for you, it’s not always fun when you’re sober and your partner is drunk or they’re always too hungover to want to do anything with you. I think you need to make it clear to your girlfriend that this is starting to test your relationship and explain to her that it’s not because you don’t like her drinking but you’d rather spend time with her sober instead of always seeing her hungover.
If she’s not willing to make any changes then I think you have to weigh up whether she is someone you see yourself being with. It’s tricky but ultimately if it’s becoming a problem within your relationship then you either have to try solve it together and compromise – accept the way it is, or walk away from your relationship knowing you tried your best.
I can’t stop cheating on my new girlfriend and I don’t know why.
We’ve been seeing each other for about nine months now, but we’ve only been official for the last two months.
I like her, she’s great and funny and cool and we have a great sex life, but I still can’t stop cheating. As soon as I’m out with my mates I can’t help but flirt and pull other women. I still love my girlfriend, but I think I like the thrill and pursuit of a new woman too. What do you advise I do?
With respect I think the answer is pretty clear – stop disrespecting your girlfriend and break up with her.
I find it hard to believe that you are truly in love with her if you continuously cheat whenever you have the chance. I think your behaviour is extremely disrespectful and if she knew how you’ve been behaving she would be heartbroken.
If you wrote in saying you’ve cheated on her once or even twice and truly regretted your actions and were certain you wouldn’t do it again, then I think there may have been a chance for you to overcome this and work on the relationship. You’ve expressed, however, that every time you are out with the lads you like flirting and pulling other women.
You can’t have your cake and eat it! If you like the thrill of pursuing new women more than you love your girlfriend then you shouldn’t be in relationship. I think in time going after different women will get boring and you’ll be ready for a relationship, but at this moment in time it doesn’t sound like you are.
This may not be the answer you expected or wanted to hear but the truth isn’t always kind… stop cheating or break up with her, it’s as simple as that! She deserves better than what you are giving her that’s for sure.